The City That Never Sleeps
Beep* I'm twinG ☆




posted : Wednesday, April 20, 2011
title :

半夜2:56AM,
我忘了我喝了杯冻鸳鸯, 一杯奶茶和一罐可乐。
我对自己很好,
自己喜欢的东西,自己想要的东西 从不会拒绝自己。
就算这些咖啡因都让我失眠了,没关系。
每一杯饮料给我的满足感, 都还在心里回味着。

部落格的存在, 我都忘了。
部落格这家伙很够义气。
你快乐时都离弃它,
但当你寂寞伤心时,它从不离开你,
你诉苦你发泄,它从不抱怨。
唯一遗憾的,你哭泣它肩膀给不了你依靠。
你心情低落,它的手给不了你怀抱。

时间流逝的那么快,这世界那么大,
一转身你可能会遇见谁,
但再一转身,就可能遗失了谁。
我还真的想要个伴。

早上也许不是闹钟把我吵醒,
是因为想见你。
虽说爱情并不是生活里的全部。
但谁不渴望爱情把你的日子都沾满。

现实里我的早晨只能渴望闹钟能迟些响起,
烦恼着怎么解决早餐,抱怨着工作的沉闷。
生活里就围绕着一些自己可有可无的烦恼。
偶尔会说些工作金钱至上安慰自己的话,
但若工作金钱爱情都很优, 以上都是废话。

现实很残酷,单身太久的女孩你伤不起。
还记得09年冬天一个下雪的夜晚,
幸运的同事有个愿意顶着寒冷来接女朋友下班的男朋友,
我羡慕,但我不比较。
只是下班后独自走去巴士站的路上,
厚厚的雪印着两人的脚印, 天气很冷但心更寒。
我很莫名其妙的大哭,我最恨这种失落感。

就算自己都有本事赚钱买自己喜欢的东西,
但上班前就是缺了封为你加油的信息。
在即将下班的时候的兴奋缺了些期待。
特别的日子却多了一份落泊感。
下班回家后把钥匙放下后,
抬头叹息的那一刻你还能想着什么?

我还是祈求在我身体里的咖啡因快消失吧
晚安。

posted : Saturday, January 8, 2011
title : t W i n K L e 091
When there's no one I could talk to,
talk to wall, definitely not the Facebook's wall.

"emo" is so not my word. I really don't know how to abreact myself.
Life sucks because "Delete" button doesn't exist.
You can't forget or stop being sad for what's hurt you.

I thought I'm tough enough but actually not.
I'm still weak especially I'm alone.
I'm stupid I'm emotional I'm brainless.

I'm so lifeless. My life is only internet.
I'm thousand miles away.
Social network website is the only thing I can get connected with others.
I'd read view comment then I'll smile laugh or maybe cry?

I know it's really a tiny, little & unimportance matter,
I never know it's hurt till it was happened.
I'm heart broken because I'm really care.

Friends, how can you forget me as I love you so much?

From the day I leave the door, I never stop missing you guys.
I never miss a chance to talk to contact with you guys.
I never got a day not viewing you guys status update.
I never stop talking to others that how lovely you guys are.

Because every single "you" is my friend, the precious one.

I admit I still feeling sad to view every photos that without me.
But I'm really happy to know everyone is doing well & happy out there
It's my decision that to be so far away.
I missed everyone's birthday every festival celebration.
It's been a year so I understand that everyone is get used to my absence.


Since when, I'm gone in your mind?
I started to see something that broke my heart.
I started to see my name disappeared.
I started to cry what I had before.
I started to worry how long our friendship can last.
I started to forgive everyone for ignored me.

I read a blog post & I cried all night long.
I know it's not the first blog post that broke my heart,
It remind me again something that I thought I'd forgot.
So I cried for all at once again.

I know it's stupid.
Or maybe I should go for another way.
Should I ignore it as everyone was ignored me?
No, I can't.

If only once, it might be an omission. I'd piss you but I'm joking.
It's twice,  it might be someone who really careless. I told you I'm sad but I'm alright.
When it's always, it's fact that I had been forgotten. I cried but I still love you guys.

Friends, please don't ever forget me.

You might be forgot me sometimes,
I'm still happy when you remember me again.

You might be forget that you had forgot me.
I'm still happy that you remember me again after I remind you.

You can forget my full name my birthday, but please don't forget I'm your friend.

You can forget when & how we met, but please don't forget the days we spent together.


If there's a question asking me "Who is your best friend?"

Definitely, I know my answer.

If the answer can be more than one, I will tick " All above" 

Maybe there will be someone think " Who cares?"

Or maybe just scroll down without reading what I wrote.

I might not be your best friend now,

but I'm still lucky to be one of your friend.

I can be your second third or any one of them,

but please not "permanently" delete me from your friend list in your life.

I love every single one of "You".


posted : Tuesday, November 30, 2010
title : t W i n K L e 090


Blink*** It's December!
A really long absence. Just found that my last post was expired for 2 months.
I'm not busy.. but I'm lazy. & I'm lifeless so not much to post.
I fancy blogging but if I'm kind of blush if someone viewed my blog.

I'm pretty fine here. 
I'm still the same. Gaining weight everyday.
My new fancy is chips with gravy sauce. Yum!

I'm still tough enough here. Used to the bad treat.
She never tired of pissing me off. Kind of sad that I don't understand what she talking.



One of the best thing in November.
Finally my girls was graduated!
So we all was officially a BA Honours holder! 

I got my 3 days off to attend their graduation, that was so lovely!
We bought them flowers & teddy for sure! We had an awesome dinner together!




Congratulations again! 
To someone who has so much to offer the world, so much success to look forward too.

But now I back to the sh*t place.
I miss everyone in Middlesbrough.I miss everyone in B12 2 as well.
Oh tears...



Another good deed in November.
It's start snowing! So might be another white X'mas in my life! Hope so..
But it turns bad when I didn't have a nice winter jacket & boot =(
I still love my old Topshop jacket but will be better if I can have a new one.
It's more bad if I got no one right beside me to keep me warm.
It's even worst that the horrible weather will cause me gain more weight.
So conclude with, I hate winter! 



Forget it, I'm looking forward for December.
My December wish;
1. Lose some weight, please.
2. Savings goes up, please.
3. *****Secret*****

49 days to board the aeroplane! 

XOXO



posted : Wednesday, September 22, 2010
title : t W i n K L e 089


♥ 

我喜欢看着天空 并不是寻找 渴望些什么      是 寂寞。

我喜欢搭火车 我很珍惜每一次搭火车的机会

我不喜欢 看着火车开走的背影 不喜欢火车站里 只留下我一人在哭泣

我好疲惫 我担心闹钟又失灵了 我宁愿不眠 也不喜欢今天又是一个人


*

火车票很贵 路途很遥远 能逗留的时间很短暂 可是一个人的时间更长

我在为一个空房间 付着房租 我希望自己还有个 可以回去的家

我总是抱怨早晨回家时 天气很冷 家住的好远 肚子好饿

但手里还握着一把家里的钥匙 心里好温暖

把大家都吵醒 说着 “一起吃早餐吧”     谢谢你们


**

 “今天真的不能留下吗.." ... "不行..."  此时心里好难过

回程的火车 总是比较慢 我总希望火车可以更慢些

一个人久了 喜欢把自己带到很远的地方   习惯买一大堆 不需要的东西 


***



回家的火车站 只有一个站牌 和长长的轨道

火车站后 有一片很辽阔的草原 有一个森林公园

公园里有一道小径 是我回去的路


****


不如往常 今天 天晴


今天的火车旧旧的 却跑得很快 我不喜欢 我必须在下一站下车


我该下车了 我并不容易哭 可是今天很懦弱 眼泪不自觉的流


我自责 怎么允许自己流泪了 该坚强些


我想起了家里的每一个人 我好想家


我想起朋友们 我自己一个人该怎么度过


脚步 背包 都很沉重 我不累 可是一个人真的好难过




***


还记得一个月前 我第一次独自一个人搭到这一站 


火车站里 没有谁在等我 当时拨的电话都是空号 我被遗忘了吧


下着雨 我提着我的行李 没有任何遮雨的地方 没有路牌


我躲在马路旁的小小告示板下 我在哭 我在后悔自己为何上了那一趟火车


我在痛哭工作好辛苦 我在担心没有钱该怎么活下去 


我翻着手机的通讯录 我又能拨谁的号码 


发着呆 眼泪没有再流了 我知道哭 只会让让我觉得自己更可怜


**


眼前是火车轨道 总会有下一班火车 我决定 无论下一班火车开到哪 我都会上车


其实我没有被遗忘 就在两小时后 火车开到轨道前 有人来接我了


此时 之前的无奈都无所谓了 心里想着 好幸运






我不知道捱苦是怎么一回事 应该是比我遇到的小挫折 还要强好几百倍


上天不会让你处理你能力以外的事 


所以遇到挫折时该自豪 上天祂  又在测试你了


*


眼泪流着 抬头望着天空


今天的天空 一直出现我喜欢的飞机云


感谢 上天让我有抬头往前看的理由


此时 手里握着 另一把钥匙 开门后喊着 “我回来啦”


我看到的是笑脸 =)


心想 笨蛋 我刚才是在哭什么啊


这里是我英国的第二个家


擦干眼泪 努力工作去吧!










posted : Friday, September 10, 2010
title : t W i n K L e 087



喜欢你的任性
喜欢你的坚持
喜欢你的温柔
喜欢你的智慧
喜欢你的勇敢
喜欢你的热情
喜欢你的可爱
喜欢你的害羞

我喜欢你的全部
好的坏的

你有优越的外表
但我最喜欢你的性格

好久以前的事
我都快忘了

这近乎完美的男人,
我想就算我用一辈子的运气也没办法拥有

你这婊子
怎么舍得让他难过
怎么舍得留下他一个人



posted : Thursday, August 26, 2010
title : t W i n K L e 086




Nike summer collection: 
Nike Dunk High Skinny Black/Speed Yellow

It's been nearly 2 months after I saw it, but I'm still EFF thinking about it!

X Myself to the MAX
I still remember the day, 3rd July 2010.
World Cup match for Germany Vs Spain ..
Massive humans watching the match inside Nike Town London.
I spot this skinny dunk, it's on sales that time.
Not expensive, 49 Pounds only.
I'm kinda in love with it, but why I don't I grab it that time huh?ARGH!

1 of the main reason was my annoying sister!
she keep bla bla bla said she want to shop others.
then my mom turn, she want to shop Burberry.
Next my dad, He was hungry & off to Piccadilly circus.
At the end, I forget back to Nike Town buy my dearly dunk.

Hmmmm fine. 
After a week, I'm still thinking about it so I shop online.
it's still on stock but no discount. I showed to ah wah, she said nice too.
But my Fuxking mind goes wrong! I didn't click the " Buy it now" button.
ARGHHHHH!

few weeks after, I still thinking about it.
I don't care, I seriously want to buy it now.
Bloody hell, it was disappeared from the Nike online store.
even Ireland Aus USA Japan store all Gone!

Big clap for myself, well done well done.
Don't buy it that time & regret now.
Want can I do now is hug my pillow & cry out LOUD!
xxxxxx


















posted : Saturday, August 21, 2010
title : t W i n K L e 085






Kiddy ♥ tOYS



Yea I'm kiddy! 


it's my Holga Baby!




I get my Holga since hmmmmm... last month. But never touch it. too bad..=3=


Bought a random 35mm film for only 1 Pounds.
Wonder how much for a 35mm film sold in Msia.It's only RM5 here.=)
I would like to buy a heap of it if it's really cheap here.


Here the soso results I get. I deem it can be done better on next time.Hope so...I'm Newbie=X




Jackie & Han


Lisa &  Jackie


Holga baby Red


dirtiness white


Houses & Birds


Jackie again.








Guess, I should take some picture for myself LOL!